PRIDE & Holiday Heart w/ Brice Izayah

[00:00:00] What's up fam, welcome back to another episode of Recap Kickback. It's me, Chappelle, your host where I talk about whatever I want to talk about, which is mostly movies, TV, media, music, or whatever else comes to mind, but I try to keep it black.

[00:00:32] I like to lean into making sure that we cover underrepresented populations, and my favorite underrepresented population is me, black people. So I'm always going to look out for mine and the people that are around me.

[00:00:44] And so if you're tuning in, you know how we get down here on Recap Kickback, but we're going to do a movie review today. And with me to talk about this particular movie, I would say for a specific occasion,

[00:00:55] but also just because I haven't seen them in a while, we got in the purple pants badass himself back for his return visit to Recap Kickback, Bryce Isaiah. Welcome back, Bryce. They not like us. They not like us. What is poppin' Chappelle?

[00:01:10] Thank you so much for having me back. I'm excited. Yeah, it's been a long time, Bryce. When was the last time we had you on? We doing a countdown or something? We were doing a countdown.

[00:01:20] Yeah, you know, because I suggested what we doing today a long time ago, but I'm not going to cut you out because we have evolved from there. Yes, yes. We're working on building a better Bryce. And we're on that journey with Bryce.

[00:01:36] So I have to thank Bryce for coming and spending this time with me today. But he's not wrong. Bryce suggested that we do a movie review a long time ago. So anybody who's been following the journey between Chappelle and Bryce, we used to do

[00:01:45] movie reviews all the time on the Purple Pants podcast, but then we got super busy. Bryce is hella famous. So it's really hard to just nail down a time to get in the room with Bryce. But for old time sakes, we're bringing it back.

[00:01:58] We're going to talk about a movie that Bryce said was very important to talk about him last time we talked. And it is Holiday Heart starring Ving Rhames. And I think, Bryce, this might be the perfect time to do this because as you know, it's June.

[00:02:09] It's Pride Month. Yes, I think it's so important with the last month of Pride Month here and Holiday Heart. I remember seeing Holiday Heart because it came out in like 2000. So it's really not that of an old movie. But that was 24 years ago and I was seven.

[00:02:27] So it is so interesting and rewatching it is, I had so many thoughts and feelings, but I just think it's so important. And it really does have a good message. And what better way than to end Pride than talking about black queer people, talking about black trans.

[00:02:49] I think that it's so important. And it's a feel good type of movie. I also feel like it's a very black movie, right? Where I feel like just from some of the situations, some of the costumes and it's not a high budget movie either.

[00:03:09] You can definitely watch this one on Tubi right now if you want to. So if you haven't seen Holiday Heart, Bryce is just giving you some quick indication of where it can be found. It's a Tubi movie, y'all. It's a Tubi movie before Tubi movies were a thing.

[00:03:20] Y'all know what type of movies we're talking about. Yeah, Bryce is not wrong. Holiday Heart is a 2000 film starring Ving Rhames, which Bryce, honestly, I think I've only seen this movie one other time.

[00:03:34] So I had forgotten a lot of the things that were going on in this movie. What made you want to watch Holiday Heart specifically? I just, you know, I think it's a very black movie. First of all, it has like Ving Rhames. I can't say his name right.

[00:03:48] Rhames. Whatever Chappelle said. But also my girl, Alfre Woodard. Yeah. In my opinion, she's the bigger star out of the two. But, you know, Ving does Mission Impossible. So I think he's a little more recognizable to a wider audience.

[00:04:05] But my girl, Alfre is a legend, is a queen, is, you know, in so many staple movies. But I don't know. I just remember seeing this movie and I'm like, you only seen it one time.

[00:04:17] But I just remember and I remember as a young queer myself, I remember watching this. And I want to say I watched it with my family. Right. And I was like a little uncomfortable watching this movie because I feel like it was like

[00:04:28] touching on some things that, you know, young queer Bryce wasn't really ready to have those conversations or just even a conversation about black queerness in movies like with my family. So I remember being a little uncomfortable when I saw this movie.

[00:04:46] I was like, oh, when I first watched it. But going back, it's like it's so endearing. And so there's just a lot of things that I emotions that I never would have thought watching it back then, watching it now.

[00:05:00] And also, I just also feel like I want to talk about pronouns. Right. Because pronouns in our society are a very big thing. And I think like how people want to be addressed is so important.

[00:05:09] But I think when a character like Holiday Hart, who was the main character and in all of the purposes, right, like Holiday does drag. But definitely or I should say they they refer to themselves as a man. But I really feel like they're non-binary. Right.

[00:05:26] Like I really feel like a lot of times when pronouns can be used, they use Holiday as a pronoun. And so I think it's so important because I even think in a portion in this movie, right, where Holiday is talking.

[00:05:41] And I think that Holiday is an older generation of us. And I feel like, you know, sorry to go on this rant, but you know, this is what we talked about. Right. Like, I really feel like there's this huge narrative now where it's just like,

[00:05:57] y'all trying to make the children gay. You're pushing the gay narrative. And it's just like, bish, what narrative? And I think that Holiday Hart is such a right, the agenda. It's such a interesting topic, right?

[00:06:12] Because it's like, first of all, queer people, gay people have been here since the start of time. However, it was how we, they assimilated into the community because we always say this before, but like, I got a Aunt John, right?

[00:06:29] Like I got an Aunt Kim or I got an Uncle Kim. Uncle Pat. Uncle Pat, right. Or Uncle Pat and Linda been roommates for 27 years. They're best friends like Queen Latifah and her roommate. Exactly. But they only got one bed in their house.

[00:06:45] And so it's like, interesting how the older generation had to deal with things. And I think the older generation was really trying to survive because being gay, being queer, being out is still very dangerous. And it still is like, threatens your life.

[00:07:02] But it was such a different generation. And so I think the way that Holiday handles what he handles is so interesting because there's just a point in the movie where he even says that like, I've never been in the closet.

[00:07:14] I've just been discreet because I had to be for my safety. And so it just brings so many interesting nuances because as I was watching the movie, I'm like, will we consider holiday trends? And I don't think that we would because Holiday addresses themselves as a man,

[00:07:32] but they're just very androgynous. And so I also think now here's where it's going left a little bit, but I also think Charles, your lunch is ready. Miss Netta. Miss Netta. I really feel like Miss Netta is, I could compare Miss Netta to Holiday in

[00:07:52] so many different ways. But now, you know, the internet is tearing Miss Netta down because Miss Netta is the mess and cussing people out. But again, I also feel like Miss Netta identifies a lot with Holiday where

[00:08:04] I think when Miss Netta and them first came out, Miss Netta was trying to say like, she's not transgender. She's not in the LGBTQ plus community because I also feel like Miss Netta is, if this is an elevator, I don't think an elevator go all the way up.

[00:08:18] All the way to the top, all the time. Maybe not all the time. And Miss Netta was essentially like, this is who I am. Like, I don't need to identify as anything. This is just who I am. This is what I've always been.

[00:08:30] And I think there are a lot of older generations that kind of feel that way. But that's what I love about this younger generation and this new generation that like they're here, they're queer, and they are living their lives loud, live, and in color.

[00:08:44] And so I love it. But I also feel like when you have this older generation, I don't think you should like bash them about not using the right pronouns because it's like they have come from a different time than us.

[00:08:55] And it's, you know, you just got to respect it. So I don't know. I just think there's just so many nuances in this movie that are just great. Yeah. I think we're going to have fun talking about this today, Bryce.

[00:09:05] So for the people who do not, who are not familiar with Holiday Heart, Bryce just outlined it a little bit for you. But Dean Raines plays a character named Holiday Heart who is a drag queen who is basically befriending a single mother and her daughter throughout

[00:09:20] the entire movie. Holiday has a very protective spirit about them. And so the entire time, he really kind of got his cape on. You know, I'm going to try to save this person. I'm going to try to save this person. I'm going to try to save this person.

[00:09:33] All while living his life as a large black gay man. You know, Holiday Heart, Dean Raines, he's not a small person. You know what I'm saying? But he's giving a lot of very effeminate energy throughout the movie. And it's a very interesting take on this story.

[00:09:48] Now, I remember watching this when I was younger, but I was a kid. And so I remember thinking this was a comedy. And now watching it older, like, okay, maybe I shouldn't be laughing at Afriwooda's character Wanda because Wanda, you know, for an eight-year-old,

[00:10:04] nine-year-old kid, I was like, hey, this is kind of funny. Wanda on that bike took me out, Bryce. I can't lie to you. I might have laughed a little too much. That is the scene that I remember the most is Wanda in the bike.

[00:10:18] And I couldn't remember where it comes up at. And when I watched it, I was like, damn, not it coming up at this point. And not this is how, like, it ends. It's crazy to me. But like you, I watched this as a child.

[00:10:32] And I don't know if I thought that it was a comedy. But I also kind of feel like, I thought it was maybe like a sister act movie. The movie starts off with Holiday doing drag and they're a drag performer

[00:10:45] at this well-known drag place in the city that they're from. But watching it now, Holiday was a horrible, horrible drag performer. Like, I was like, what in the hell is going on here? But now again, Holiday is doing the best that he can.

[00:11:11] Also, let's just call a thing a thing. Again, this was 2000. But why are we getting a heterosexual man to play a part of a drag queen or a trans woman when there are so many beautiful trans women out here that could play and kill this role?

[00:11:29] Although I do think Dean Raines did an amazing job. But an important part of this movie that I really want to talk about is that what I didn't realize as a child to now is that a huge part of this movie is about Holiday having a broken heart.

[00:11:47] Holiday was in a, and let's also talk about this, Holiday was in a down-low relationship that he highlights and loves and lives his best life about. But his partner died and Holiday is essentially depressed. He hasn't really been living the life that he wants to live in.

[00:12:08] And another funny thing that I think about this movie is there's this big thing about Holiday wanting to start over and go to Paris. But it's really not him starting over going to Paris. Bitch, you just want to take a trip to Paris!

[00:12:24] He just wants to go to Paris. To say, I went to Paris. But the way that they bring it up in the movie, it's like, I'm getting out of here to go to Paris.

[00:12:35] But it's like, no, you mean you just want to go to Paris for seven days and come back? Well, he wanted to go for a long time, it seems. But then it's like the people at home just be dragging Holiday back.

[00:12:44] It's his heart, Bryce. It's like he wants to go. He wants to go. There's nothing for him in the United States. You know, he's lost the love of his life. They always wanted to go to Paris together.

[00:12:54] So Holiday's like, eff it, I'm going to go to Paris, find me a new love and start over there. But every time he tries to get out, don't disrespect Towanda, this crackhead lady keeps dragging her back into her nonsense. So he never quite gets out.

[00:13:09] But before we talk about that, Bryce, I do want to stop down on some of the things you pointed out. Bing Raims as Holiday Hart is probably a curious decision, looking at the 2000s and how these roles were generally cast for people.

[00:13:21] Because like we said, Bing Raims is a very large, muscular dude. And I think in Bali, about the 2000s, people were really trying to depict gay people as a little bit softer and more feminine. And Holiday Hart is giving you both of those energies at the same time.

[00:13:37] Like a big masculine guy who also wears a wig and performs the Supremes at his drag shows. You know, very odd. I'm like, you got the baby love, but Holiday, what? So Bing Raims is who they chose. And I think he did a great job.

[00:13:54] However, you were saying that there are probably other people who could have played these roles. And I would probably agree with what we've been seeing in recent days, in recent movies and television, is that even if you cannot find a trans person to do this role,

[00:14:08] a drag queen, a drag queen who actually practices drag, who probably wants to be an actor, could have done this role as well. Do you think Bing Raims was a big name at the time? It is 2000. So I think he was a big name.

[00:14:22] And I also think that like, and this is the caveat that they say sometimes with black men, in order for black men to make it big, this is, I think if you watch Club Shea Shea with Cat Williams,

[00:14:36] he says this, that like a lot of black men have to put on a dress and wig in order for their career to go to the next level. And so I think that, I don't necessarily think that's true,

[00:14:48] but I definitely think that there is a part of that catalog in the early 2000s that I think is partly true. And I think that Bing wanted to add this to his catalog. But I completely agree with you, though.

[00:15:06] Like, I think of like Bob the Drag Queen, who was allegedly on Traitor Seas 3, like he would have been a great person for this. Ms. Nada, T.S. Madison, RuPaul, I think would have been great. Also, I think Tu-On Flu and like with Patrick Swayze. Yeah, Wesley Snipes.

[00:15:24] And that was a huge hit movie. And so again, I think Bing Rains was like, let me get my chance at doing this. But I do think that although as unbelievable as the character that Bing Rains is,

[00:15:39] I also feel like trans and drag and people that do drag come in all different shapes and sizes. And there are some people that look like Bing Ring or I can't... Bing Rains! Yeah, they look like that. And so I think that he did a good job.

[00:15:58] Like, the things that I didn't like was, oh, the honey. Oh, girl. Like, that was like a little cringy to watch. But I also thought that there were so many other moments where I was just like, wow, he's doing a great job.

[00:16:11] I also just want to talk about Holiday and this love that he kept talking about, which again, at first I'm like, this is really sad that like he's lost the love of his life. But really, it's really sad because it's like, it was a down-low relationship.

[00:16:30] Like, I guess in their own home, they were comfortable. But we see a flashback to Holiday at the funeral in true Black fashion. The funerals is the last place that you're going to see a lot of family members or people. And so it's like, it's weddings and funerals,

[00:16:51] I feel like in Black culture that is either going to go really, really nice or ish is going to pop off. And Holiday was popping off at his partner's funeral, essentially like letting the family know that they were lovers and that Holiday is going to miss them.

[00:17:12] And he liked one of Holiday's songs, that Holiday was doing a rendition of a song that I was just like, now why are you doing that, Holiday? Didn't he do baby love at the funeral too? Yeah, he did baby love. Are you okay, Holiday?

[00:17:27] Look, we understand Holiday is heartbroken, but this is these people, this is a funeral, okay? I don't care who you are. Baby love is not to be performed at the funeral. But you're right, this is such a, it's a wild moment in the film because Holiday Hart

[00:17:42] and his late boyfriend Fisher were obviously a couple. They have pictures together. Like you said, it might've been like on the low and Holiday is at a funeral for somebody who, it looks like Fisher worked in the service of some type,

[00:17:56] like maybe he was like a fireman or a cop or something. Like a public worker, a fireman, yes. And in the year 2000, that's definitely not flying at a funeral, right? This large black man in a wig, you know, crying and hollering and singing baby love

[00:18:10] at a funeral for somebody who's probably been keeping that part of their life separate from their employment, right, separate from being a cop and this, that, other. So we see Holiday showing his ass and to where they try to remove Holiday.

[00:18:23] Like the police squad are like trying to pull him out. And Holiday's like, I didn't do nothing. I'm like, you're right, you didn't do nothing. But also please stop, stop. I understand, but also stop because you ain't hurting nobody but his baby love at the funeral.

[00:18:36] Like you can't make this about you right now. Even though for Holiday, that might've been the only time in his mind that he thought he was gonna find a true love like this, you know, somebody who loved him for being big Ving Rhames built,

[00:18:49] but also, you know, Holiday heart, you know? And so I thought that was such a fascinating moment. And there's probably other reasons why too. It was an epic moment for sure though, right? Because Holiday also is like the choir director at church

[00:19:04] and Holiday is in church all the time. And we see Holiday dress up in like, again, very androgynous, like maybe like overflowing suits. And so Holiday doesn't always dress in drag. And so I think that it was a conscious decision

[00:19:19] for Holiday essentially to be like, you know what? Y'all didn't accept us for who we are. I'm gonna come here and show my ass. And I think that that really was Holiday's just F you to the family. It's deep.

[00:19:35] One of the shows Bryce and I talk about together on the Purple Pants podcast, and then I hope we will be talking about a lot moving forward if they ever, you know, decide to release the footage is P-Valley on Starz.

[00:19:47] And Bryce, does Holiday heart give you that same Uncle Cliff energy? Because I can't unsee it. Absolutely. I think that Holiday heart is like the evolution of Holiday heart is Uncle Cliff. And again, I also feel like Salsy Santana is another evolution. A big Frida.

[00:20:12] Like, right. I just think that, you know, being gay, we're not a monolith. We come in so many different sizes and shapes. And yeah, we've always been here. We've always existed. People just choose not to acknowledge the existence of a man that gives us Uncle Cliff.

[00:20:30] But we've always been here. And so I just definitely think it's been an evolution. And I love to see the evolution. But absolutely, Holiday gives me Uncle Cliff vibes. Just, you know, different eras. Like, you know, I think Holiday is from Baltimore.

[00:20:44] Uncle Cliff is from, you know, down in the valley. Down in the valley where the girls get naked. So, it's different. But like, I just also love how they're both just very pillars in the community. And also let's just talk about Holiday might be a drag performer, but

[00:21:00] Holiday owns properties. Holiday has, you know, income. Yes, Uncle Cliff. Like, their business. Their business mind. They have money coming in. And so I definitely love about that. We also, Holiday meets the main two other characters which is Wanda and Nikki. Wanda is definitely an addict.

[00:21:26] She's trying to get her life together. She's got a nine-year-old little girl named Nikki. She's dealing with some drug dealer. He's beating her up. And Nikki runs outside to find help. And she finds big ol' Holiday. And Holiday kind of sort of steps in. I also just think

[00:21:44] Holiday is crazy. Holiday got a little craziness to him. Just a little bit. I'm not walking down the street and somebody, first of all, I'm minding my business because you know where I'm from, you can get shot. But shout out to Holiday for stepping in

[00:21:59] and not only stepping in to help Wanda because she's like, you know, getting being abused by her lover. But he brings them in to his duplex that he owns. And he's like we'll worry about the rent later. I'm just gonna get you guys settled in.

[00:22:18] Um, I'm pretty sure me stopping you from getting beat would have been the extent of my, you know, hope y'all alright. Send out my wishes. Take care. Here's a knife. Take it with you. You know, that kind of thing. Y'all need something on your way out. Bersie, Holiday

[00:22:43] to me, and this is me on the outside looking in, is this mother? Is this really a mother? The reason I ask is because I've watched Pose. I've seen Pose, right? And in Pose, you had these mothers in the community that would say

[00:22:59] alright, I'm gonna take you in and y'all gonna be my kids. Y'all could be my age and y'all still gonna be my kids. And I got so much of that vibe from Holiday Heart and I don't know if it's because Holiday Heart

[00:23:11] obviously does not have a family that's around like a blood family that's around but Super Save a Whole Holiday literally took these people in after getting in a knife fight essentially for them, put them in this home and said you ain't gotta worry about rent

[00:23:25] for a while. Y'all good here. And just adopted them as his family where a wise person would say do not do that. That's unsafe. This woman is a crackhead and you don't know her. You know? So do you think it's just like a community thing?

[00:23:39] Do you think this is just like a staple of being a big strong man in a world where he doesn't have a lot of family where he can use his protective instincts to kind of bring people to him? Because I thought that was crazy too Bryce.

[00:23:54] So I don't I think that Holiday is just the name of the movie, Holiday Heart and I think that Holiday is just a caring, giving, loving person and so I don't think it's really indicative of his sexuality. I think it's more like

[00:24:08] that's just the person that he is and again I think me re-watching this movie from the start, I discovered that Holiday is in a depression. Holiday is not happy. He wanted to start a family with Fisher. Fisher died and now Holiday is just

[00:24:24] looking for something. And sometimes when you look for stuff, it doesn't come in the shape or form that you want it to come in but it's right in front of your face and you have to realize it. And so I think that

[00:24:36] Holiday was just doing a good job but also, okay so no I'm lying I think really we're going to fast forward a little bit because there was a point in the movie where Wanda kind of sort of relapses Wanda is first of all

[00:24:52] addicted to drugs and Wanda is addicted to bad boys. Yeah, she like a drug dealer. She like drugs and drug dealers. Okay, now my job is she can miss me with the drugs but you know that essence of the dealer alright Wanda I'm with you. I see it.

[00:25:11] Where is Bryce's little murder? Where is he at? I get it, I see it Wanda and so Wanda gets a new man in her life and we can talk about him later because I also think that that character is like so problematic. I have so many problems

[00:25:27] with that character and I cannot wait to get there. You ain't lying. It kind of pissed me off but so Wanda actually is acting brand new which is wild to me because ma'am you're living in my house I'm raising your daughter as my daughter

[00:25:45] what are you talking about? And you gonna flip the script on me like that wild but there was a point where Wanda is coming to confide in Holiday and Holiday is just like you think you're the like I understand you're struggling with addiction but you

[00:26:01] think you're the only person that struggles with things and then he shares a story with us that his mother was being abused. He fought to he sought to defend his mother from getting abused. I believe he actually unalived the person and trying to protect his mother. His mother

[00:26:23] then turned on him and wanted him thrown away. He got sentenced, he was in jail he was abused in jail from 16 years old and I would assume that Holiday just didn't one day turn into Holiday Hart I would assume that Holiday was always Holiday and so while

[00:26:42] he was in these group homes he was abused and so we see this story where clearly Wanda getting abused obviously would have had to bring him back to his childhood which is why I think he took them in the way that he did not

[00:26:58] just because it was just any old random person but we learned that about Holiday and his family life and that his family didn't really want anything to do with him and his mother was being abused so for him to see young Nikki asking for help

[00:27:10] of course I feel like he had to step in Yeah and Nikki is an interesting character as well because Nikki will be the one who she's more like the adult in the relationship between her and her mom and we see that a lot of times in families where

[00:27:26] the parents aren't around or they're abused or something like that The children will take Exactly, the children will take a more adult role because they know they have to they don't have a choice right and so Nikki will tell us throughout the film that she

[00:27:40] remembers how life was before her mom got on drugs and now she knows what life is like now that they are on like you know her mom's dealing with the addiction and so we'll see her waking up on the pallet and looking

[00:27:52] very happy just to have a safe roof over their head and not be dealing with the abuser and you know Of course she's dealing with her mom too, Wanda's promising left and right I'm not gonna be around no drugs I'm not gonna be doing any drugs, Bryce

[00:28:05] I wanna get back to my writing, I'm doing poetry I'mma get into Essence magazine Her mom is telling her everything that she wants to hear but you can tell on Nikki's face Bryce that she's heard these stories before and that the relapse could happen

[00:28:17] and she would be prepared for it even as a child I think she graduates from middle school in this so she what 12-13 years old? Yeah baby Again, it's like I don't think Wanda is a bad person. I think that again she's addicted to drugs

[00:28:33] but she wasn't always addicted to drugs she was addicted to men or wanted to be loved by men which you know my social work background could tell me that like you know she wasn't loved maybe her father wasn't around she didn't understand what really love was

[00:28:47] so she met a man who then introduced her to drugs and when she, after she meets Holiday and Holiday brings Nikki and Wanda in a honeymoon phase like they start to you know really nest in this home they're creating memories and there's even a part where

[00:29:07] one night Holiday is laying on the couch and kind of like spooning Wanda because it's raining and Wanda is sharing with Holiday that like on nights like this she craves the drugs or she wants to use and so it's like in those moments you're just, you can relate

[00:29:26] you know for me like I had a brother that has died of a drug overdose right and so it's like you know in those moments where it's like the person has to want it for themselves but also addiction is real addiction is hard thing to

[00:29:38] kick and sometimes it's like you believe that you can kick it and then it's like you're triggered by being around something or different things and you know if Wanda is saying that nights like this and it was raining that the rain you like that's

[00:29:54] your heart has to go out for her like you know it's not an easy road and we see the honeymoon phase as it plays out it starts off rough obviously you know like Wanda she's a grown woman with a kid you can't tell her how to

[00:30:08] raise her kid all that good stuff she's also you know an addict so she has her own things she's very hardened you know there's a few moments where she's being really rude to Holiday Heart and Holiday is just kind of

[00:30:18] he being rude back but he kind of like he has to be on the defensive because Wanda talking wild to him I'm like all right lady for you to be homeless you really stepping outside yourself okay girl for you not paying rent like I think

[00:30:30] is why you really tripping you really tripping because they showing up for dinner and she's like I cooked ma'am you did this is not good how they had to tell her like don't touch the kitchen again honestly this ain't this ain't it but we see them slowly

[00:30:46] start to work things out Holiday off the strength of his word alone is able to get her a job at a boutique because she's being rude about that and then he starts to give her feedback about her writing as well and suggest that

[00:31:01] she writes about things that are other parts of her life other than her body and right she said oh I'll pull this Sally out right now and I thought I've been a nasty girl I said who don't put Sally away I don't want to see that

[00:31:17] but you know they get really familiar with each other very quickly and one of the things we see them doing when they're cuddling and when they're having family time holiday Nikki and Wanda is that they're watching the imitation of life do you know this movie I've seen

[00:31:31] clips of it yeah so it's so funny to me that it keeps coming up so in the first time we see this part happen Nikki points it out they're watching the movie and they're always watching the same movie

[00:31:41] every time they cut the movies on it's like they got that one VHS you was there you know you got your movie you put it in you watch it you watch it again you watch it again so they're watching imitation of life

[00:31:51] and Nikki says I don't see how anybody can turn their black their back on their mother right because in the movies Sarah I think her name is Sarah Jane she spends her entire life denying her blackness and basically trying to separate herself from her mom because she's white

[00:32:07] okay that is the weirdest thing sorry the weirdest thing is that like I just on TikTok literally last night because I could not sleep like I literally just watched a whole like rundown of that movie like that's why you know your phones

[00:32:23] be watching your thing because like why would that be on my for you page I didn't know that was the movie where the girl is white and her mom is black yeah yeah Sarah Jane can pass for white and so the entire the entire movie she's denying

[00:32:35] she's denying her mom's I'm just saying the actress is yes yes yeah yeah but she's denying she's denying her her blackness and her mom the entire time right and so it's funny to me because of course we see that Nikki is

[00:32:49] obviously going to struggle with her own relationship with her mom but at such a young age she's like I could never see myself turning my back on my mom who has done all you know all this horrible stuff as an addict I still couldn't see it right

[00:33:01] but in this movie we see Sarah Jane only comes around like to that moment of accepting her mom once her mom dies and she's at the funeral and Bryce is very reminiscent of Holiday at the funeral for his ex his late boyfriend Fisher sorry that's his name

[00:33:20] so at Fisher's Holiday is at the funeral and he's like I love this man everybody's trying to drag him out like what are you doing crazy person like this is not how did you even get invited here

[00:33:32] and Sarah Jane did the same thing she shows up at the funeral she's like that's my mama and all the black folks looking at her like girl no it's not get out of here it's such a funny parallel that they use that movie to kind of

[00:33:44] show what it looks like when somebody denies you for so long and then they can only really accept your position in their life when it's too late and when it's gone right and so I thought that was so funny that you pointed out Holiday at the

[00:33:56] funeral and how that was the moment Holiday could really say no look I was with this person because prior to that nobody knew right which is wild because it's like y'all had this whole life together but you know men on the low is a real thing

[00:34:12] and you know they it's a real thing so I again so many levels that I could relate to a Holiday in just my own personal life or in my own past life I think is so interesting where it's like you feel like this movie is so

[00:34:28] far-fetched but it's really not at all and I think the even more interesting point is that like there are times there's so many temptations in Wanda's life or so many like ways that she relapses and at one of Holiday's shows there is a drug dealer named

[00:34:49] Silas there it's Silas right yeah it's Silas yeah imagine also wild because Silas from Summer House kind of also reminds me ah not the drug dealer from Holiday Heart um yeah so they end up well for one we do like you said we see Wanda kind of really

[00:35:11] fighting with the idea of backsliding throughout um there's a moment where we see she's having writer's block right because being creative is hard and she finds a little doobie a little joint in her purse and you know they say it's a gateway

[00:35:25] drug but I feel like once the door to the gateway had already been opened at that point it's just like a skeleton key you know like you don't want to do anything that's going to push you over the edge and she starts there

[00:35:35] and then from there it's just slowly going down hill we see her running to her ex the one that was beating her up LT in the alley and Nikki is the one who shows up and kind of shuts that down and for a second you're thinking okay Wanda

[00:35:47] what are we doing but when she ends up at the drag club and we meet Silas the first thing we see is Silas is dealing drugs we don't see that he deals drugs to Wanda at first but he does start to try to holler at Wanda

[00:36:02] and then they start hanging out next thing you know we find out Wanda is in love with Silas and she can't be without him and you know the drugs is flowing you know they are and so she starts acting crazy and completely disrespecting Holiday

[00:36:16] and that's why I was like Holiday put her ass out put her on the street. It's crazy I don't think though my synopsis of because again Silas is a very interesting character and I think that as specifically black queer people and

[00:36:36] let me just even be more direct with myself black gay men and heterosexual black men I think have such an interesting dynamic right because Silas is very clearly homophobic does not like gay people and is very dismissive of Holiday once Wanda and Silas get together he comes to

[00:37:00] the drag place or he comes to Holiday's show and essentially is telling Holiday Nikki does not need to be around this type of influence to stay away from them he will pay them rent but essentially to like move on and get them out

[00:37:18] of your life like he is the father figure in their life now which is also wild wild! if you gonna pay rent then maybe I will mind my own business if that's what you're going to do I'm a landlord now

[00:37:35] that's why I am because right now I'm raising this whole family but if you step in and take over Holiday the nurse to Wanda back to health and taking Nikki all up Holiday is the surrogate father in this moment or step mama at this point

[00:37:49] Holiday is going to the school plays and all that kind of stuff showing up for Nikki so when shows up this fool shows up with a gun to the drag show and holds Holiday at gunpoint and says alright you gonna keep charging

[00:38:03] them rent I'll make sure you get paid but aside from you being a landlord they don't need you no more Holiday Hart is a better human than I am because you pull a gun on me you pull a gun

[00:38:13] on me and you think you're going to live in my duplex I'll burn that duplex to the ground before I let you live in there are you crazy? it is crazy but also it's like there have people have these feelings about trans and gay people so it's not

[00:38:27] surprising I think what really took Holiday off guard was the next time that he sees Wanda and Nikki and they are giving him the cold shoulder they're essentially being like yeah we're good and then Nikki even comes to Holiday and it's just like well you know

[00:38:45] I always wanted a family for Nikki and I didn't want to always have a scene or it to be a scene and like the weird thing about it is that like Holiday Wanda and Nikki became a family unit they didn't like it just happened and now that Silas

[00:39:02] is here now Wanda sees a traditional family unit and she's like you know well this is what Silas wants Silas is you know he a dope boy he making money he can pay the way he's giving Wanda the life that she wants and so she's just so

[00:39:18] easily able to kick Holiday out which is just wild but I think that that is even more what breaks Holiday because again like I just said someone like a Silas okay we saw that a mile away like you know you're homophobic you're transphobic whatever it is but like

[00:39:36] for Wanda literally a person off the street that I brought in for you to turn your back on me and even for Nikki I think that that was such a hard for Holiday and just again to see it is so crazy and the one maybe redeeming factor about

[00:39:56] Silas right because I was curious about this was like is Silas giving Wanda drugs but in actuality I really think that Silas was not giving her drugs and she was running out the streets to hide that from Silas because Silas' standpoint was like

[00:40:12] I deal the drugs I don't do the drugs see I I have a hard time believing that there were drugs in that house and Wanda didn't have access to them you know like that's really what bothers me because I'm thinking he might not do the drugs

[00:40:24] but who is he? He's gonna be the one to put up a moral compass about Wanda doing them? It doesn't sit with me well because the whole time I was thinking she didn't even need to be around a drug dealer you know that was one of the things

[00:40:36] Nikki from Jump like I don't wanna be around anything associated with drugs because I can backslide and so maybe even if Silas isn't giving her he's definitely has now ushered her into the world where these are like commonplace they're everywhere he's not hiding

[00:40:51] the drug dealing from her because we see he will eventually take Nikki on a drug deal so if Nikki didn't been to the trap house you know he'd have took Wanda to the trap house so I had a good hate into Silas in this movie I'm talking about

[00:41:05] yeah hated Silas hate and also there's Holiday has a best friend or a friend named Jambalaya Blue but I think their drag name is like Jambalaya that's such a funny name why is your name Jambalaya? why is that your name? that's who's name at Holiday's

[00:41:29] club where he does drag another random thing of a random thing and again this is just how you know in my opinion this movie was not produced by I'm a queer person I really feel like this movie was produced by or written by somebody

[00:41:45] that's adjacent to the community because there's this character that's always at the drag shows it's like this black guy like relatively pretty like handsome and they make it they don't ever say anything but like this person is very obsessed with Holiday and I just

[00:42:05] feel like I mean I don't know a lot but I know two plus two and I do realize that like this character is like I don't believe Holiday and this character would you know work out but who knows but it's just weird

[00:42:22] to see this one character that's like always every time Holiday's there they're like sitting at the table at first like staring at Holiday and then when Holiday starts to go forward they be like ahhhhhh do you know the guy that I'm talking about?

[00:42:34] I do and it's funny too because they never really address Holiday and that guy at all because Holiday's heart is in Paris he just keeps going to Paris every time we look up and he only makes it to Paris once but he's at the travel agent

[00:42:46] and you know it's really hard when you gotta see people go to a travel agent remember those days Bryce where people had to go and probably buy like an atlas and all kinds of stuff to travel this man is at the travel agent at least once a month

[00:42:58] like okay this time I swear I'm finna leave I promise I'm going to Paris and the travel agent's like okay sure okay sure you are I hope you find what you're looking for maybe that person is right in front of Holiday's face

[00:43:08] and he can't see it because one he trying to raise grown folks and Wanda and then eventually even raising Silas to an extent Bryce that's the plot twist of all plot twists to me Silas starts off the first time him and Holiday even have a real good conversation

[00:43:24] and he has a gun in Holiday's face and he's threatening to kill him if he don't get out of Nikki and Wanda's life Nikki and Wanda who Silas just met and so he's trying to throw Holiday out of their life at gunpoint by the middle of this movie

[00:43:37] it's now Holiday, Silas and Nikki are all together as a happy family and Wanda is out on the street strung out on drugs I just wasn't prepared for this I was not either it's an interesting point where Holiday finally is like I'm going to Paris I'm leaving

[00:43:55] I'm done I'm through okay au revoir merci beaucoup after Silas has asked him to leave he's like you know what I'm going to leave then plot twist Silas comes banging on Holiday door and this is again why this is where in the movie

[00:44:13] I realized I was like oh maybe he wasn't supporting Wanda's habit but essentially he has said that Wanda has relapsed she in this moment says that stuff has come up missing and now he has to go on a trip

[00:44:27] to see some people and take care of some stuff so essentially what I read from that was the product coming up short and the money not enough Wanda got into the stash a little bit it seems you go ahead Wanda I mean no Wanda

[00:44:43] don't do that but also go ahead Wanda also I'm all over the place forgive me but no it's funny I really feel like what's that what's the name of the African American Museum in Smithsonian in DC I really feel like there needs to be an exhibit

[00:45:04] in that museum of Wanda's wigs no no not that wig the wig was rough man it was a rough Alfre Woodard she was like I want to say like 50 like 46 when this movie dropped and Alfre Woodard looks really good for her

[00:45:26] like she's 70 right now you wouldn't know it but she has never looked older than she does in this movie because I mean they said we gonna make you look like a crack head and they did it it's just the way that because my true I feel like

[00:45:40] her makeup looked the same when she was clean and when she wasn't clean the only way that you could tell if Alfre was using was her hair somebody took it and threw it on the bed and then started jumping on it it was it was crazy so

[00:45:58] what's his name Silas comes to Holiday and is like essentially I gotta leave town I need for you to watch Nikki and Wanda and Holiday is like clutch my pearls and close my legs I know you lying I'm minding my business finally finally Holiday has found

[00:46:20] his lane right and you gonna drag him back into y'all stuff and Holiday I just want to smack him upside the head like stop helping them you don't owe them people nothing and that's what Jambalaya was telling Holiday before the movie leave these people go

[00:46:35] so Silas leaves then the next morning Holiday is off to Perry and he Nikki doesn't say anything to him Nikki's not speaking to him and he's off to Perry however his maternal instincts tell him that maybe he should not go

[00:46:55] and so we see him get in a cab and then all of a sudden we see a plane fly over okay they in 2000 they just knew they was fucking up these transitions okay somebody in that department was like they gonna love Holiday on the plane and reality

[00:47:13] he gonna be under the plane ambitious grave he's like I was like ah or this movie is the smokey transition too yeah I didn't like that because I'm like the way that transition in my opinion leads to a flashback right and we don't

[00:47:31] even know how much time be passed whenever they do these transitions it's like that's what I couldn't figure out over the life of me how old Nikki was she done graduated from school twice I think but anyway so Holiday doesn't go right

[00:47:43] they do this plane transition and we like ooh way Perry and really Holiday is back home something in him he couldn't leave goes to the apartment and discovers that Wanda has been gone for days and he's like why didn't you tell me anything Nikki's

[00:48:00] like I thought you were mad at me so then begins this chapter of Holiday now raising Nikki yeah and he's hitting the streets looking for Wanda he's searching but in the meantime he's really raising Nikki like he got her baptized and like she's graduating with honors

[00:48:18] from elementary school I guess I don't know I thought that was so weird but at the graduation Wanda is still popping up she's still lurking from a distance she showed up with the weeds like I got y'all some flowers

[00:48:32] in the car like stop it get out of here so yeah she's back on the crack and Nikki and Holiday are living life like okay we're moving on and this is when Nikki finally starts to age into that let me start

[00:48:46] asking Holiday some questions about this whole situation because Silas had been telling them that you know Holiday should not be dressing like a woman and all this other stuff Holiday's a bad person because he's gay and all this other stuff Nikki finally said

[00:48:58] so you be sleeping with dudes like that's what you do Holiday was like a church woman like excuse me Holiday you be getting down don't you I really feel like so Nikki did ask do you sleep with men but I really felt like Nikki was like

[00:49:15] you be sucking like I really felt like that's what that scene kind of gave me in that scene but right so she wants to know and again this is where we learn a little bit more about Holiday where Holiday's like I've never been

[00:49:31] in the closet but I also which also kind of like but you're discreet but he said this is the quote I wanted to flag up for you he said I ain't marching with no queens and I was like Holiday are you being homophobic but did you hear

[00:49:55] what he said though here's the thing though right here's the thing though did you catch the point that he was essentially trying to make though like I'm black first right and I think that intersectionality I think that that's like important because also

[00:50:11] trans women was on the front line for the LGBTQ plus movement and the queer community was on the front line in the civil rights movement so let's not erase this from history however in that moment I really felt what Holiday was essentially saying was that like I've marched

[00:50:29] I've done it but I'm old now like I'm old the young girls are out here taking the reins and so like I feel like it was a negative statement but I also just kind of felt like I understood what Holiday was saying also was just like really like

[00:50:44] okay but also you have to remember with Stonewall trans women were at the front line however when it became more of a political movement they moved our black trans women out of the way because they couldn't lead a movement and it really became a white man's

[00:51:06] journey and so there is a disconnect and so again I really do feel like Holiday was touching on a lot of different things that will kind of go over your head and so again I really do appreciate some of the things that Holiday was saying but

[00:51:20] that conversation with Nikki and Holiday was just very interesting and I loved that because I also feel like for me I've had those moments with like my nephew my youngest, well my oldest nephew I remember like there was a time when he was like Uncle Bryce

[00:51:36] and I didn't know what was coming I kind of sort of had the same reaction as Holiday like and my nephew was like Uncle Bryce like are you gay? and it was like such a weird moment but also

[00:51:50] it was like okay well if now or if any moment is for me to absolutely live in my truth and be who I am and like not take not backpedal because I don't know in what realm my nephew was asking me this

[00:52:04] and so I wanted to be like and just interesting seeing these moments with Holiday and Nikki and again I love the fact that they're like getting to know each other because I feel like a huge part of Holiday's story is he's a helper, he wants to help

[00:52:22] and I think at one point in time when they were watching that movie that you were saying Wanda even asked well when are you going to share with us your story and he said when you write that book when you're on your second book

[00:52:35] how about that? How about you mind your own business? I said okay Holiday Okay there are certain parts where Holiday is great now here is where the plot twist comes as Nikki, Wanda been gone for a while then all of a sudden Silas pops back up yeah and

[00:52:55] this is what really gets me, this is why I'm telling you this Silas man will never know peace as long as I'm on this podcast I gotta talk about this because Wanda does appear back at the house eventually and she's robbing them blind

[00:53:07] she just stole the girl's necklace and Nikki basically Nikki is just giving her her jewelry so her mama will stop stealing from her and she even says I started to think that maybe if people stop giving me gifts then my mama will stop

[00:53:21] stealing from me, she won't have anything to steal so it's a very sad existence Nikki has going on in a relationship with her mom but Holiday kicks her out and she says hey don't come back so you get yourself right he offers to take her to the hospital

[00:53:35] yeah it was bad she even tried to steal the bike from Nikki when she was younger now she's stealing necklaces and earrings and so it's a whole thing and so Silas comes back and Holiday I guess thought he was in jail but Silas shows up with gifts

[00:53:51] as usual because Silas is a drug dealer so if anything he gonna be able to do is shower you with a bunch of presents and stuff like that but for me Bryce they did not seem unhappy enough to see Silas I really feel like

[00:54:06] they welcomed him back too well you know too fast Holiday is pissed because they are playing this game they're playing a video game too loud Holiday when they're trying to play the piano he's such a grandma I don't know why they give him this elderly woman energy

[00:54:22] this little light of mine in the middle of the night but in this moment they end up playing Mario Kart and really bonding and Holiday and Silas almost come to an understanding about where Silas was coming from why he left

[00:54:38] and Holiday is just way too forgiving for me Bryce I would have kicked these people out of my house yeah that's the part for me but again I feel like there are so many unspoken things here right when Silas arrives back he essentially says

[00:54:52] that he heard that Wanda is on the street selling her body he is good on that the Wanda ship has sailed he wants no part of Wanda and so there is the part of he came back for Nikki I think again with the smoke transitions

[00:55:08] I think a lot more time has passed than what we really see on the movie and so there was this relationship that Nikki and Silas had and to see how happy Nikki was to see Silas was like I got one of my parents back

[00:55:23] I think that's one thing that we need to consider and I think also how happy Nikki was and now with Holiday being in this parental role you want to see the good, you want to see your child happy and so Silas now comes back around

[00:55:41] and he has to stay at your house he's sleeping on the couch there's just also some weird stuff like when Silas goes to sleep and Holiday puts the cover like Holiday take your ass to bed that's what I'm talking about

[00:55:57] Holiday he lost me about halfway through the film I'm not lying you cannot be the doting mother over this man who pulled the gun on you let me tuck you in because it seemed like Holiday was two seconds from going Charles, his damn self

[00:56:11] what do you think this is? Chappelle if you spent the night over my house and I looked up and you putting a blanket on me I was fine you know what I'm saying again if it's Nikki or a child okay it makes sense that child is probably cold

[00:56:29] this is a grown ass man a grown man who pulled a gun on you Holiday Hart y'all been forgiving people for pulling a gun on y'all too easily because I would never forget this I hated all of this I hate that Holiday welcomed him back

[00:56:45] I don't care if Nikki needed a parent or not how about this Holiday if you love Nikki so much don't invite crackheads into her life and crack dealers because you definitely letting the crack dealer come and stay with you that's problematic let's also talk about

[00:57:02] so we met Silas selling drugs in a gay club now he goes smoke transition smoke transition yeah now he come back now you driving a limousine like I just I need answers so now you a limousine dope seller I'm confused however all of that didn't make sense

[00:57:33] but I also again I think the what they call it the thread the streamline of this movie is that family and it's like this family that we wanted you know Holiday wanted Fischer Nikki just wanted Normacy Normacy yeah Wanda wanted this image and also I guess maybe Silas

[00:57:58] at this point and now all of a sudden the players have shifted and now it's Holiday Silas and Nikki and now it's like this interesting unit that we have and like we kind of love it but we also it's just like I don't know

[00:58:16] I feel like in order there is a level of forgiveness that I think that people have to have but I also just feel like again like you keep saying you pulled a gun on me right what's stopping him from doing that again you know what are you

[00:58:30] doing you know that's I don't know and then again even if you can forgive that this man definitely left you with his child for like a month you know what I'm saying like if he took Nikki in just decided alright I'm finna go

[00:58:42] you can't just keep letting these people back in your life that's why I think I started getting so annoyed and even watching on Co-parent when it's Silas and Holiday Heart and Nikki and she gets her period and they're like oh my god what are we gonna do

[00:58:55] how do we talk to her about it you know like oh she got two dads now what do we know about feminine products they're trying to sneak and grab condoms in case she starts to get sexually active and all kinds of stuff the whole time I'm like

[00:59:09] hide the condoms what is happening but you know what Nikki's interesting to me because when she's getting older she's talking to Holiday Heart about the family she wants to have right I'm gonna get married and have a bunch of kids Holiday Heart called her fast

[00:59:24] see that's what I'm talking about the problem in the black community is really these little tiny things like that right the little stuff that really like that woman that girl saying she wants to grow up to get married and have a kid that's not being fast stop shaming

[00:59:38] this little girl you know what I'm saying but you inviting a crackhead to come live with her make it make it make sense you are laundering drug money through your rental properties but nobody wants to talk about it right like sir

[00:59:55] you're paying for this duplex with crack money there is a war or drugs you are helping that's what I'm saying like you out I was trying to be supportive but damn can we also just talk about why the silas need to stay on your couch

[01:00:15] there is a duplex across the street they moved in he moved in like Holiday was his new Wanda that's not it listen Bryce if there was a plot twist where they actually ended up in a relationship together I would have been so mad I probably would have fought

[01:00:31] Bing Rans and Bing Rans would beat my ass because he's a big dude but I probably would have had to punch him because why did you let this happen but I think this is somehow even weirder Bryce is that they don't have this is a completely platonic

[01:00:42] relationship between a man and a man who hates him okay a man who is like legit trying to hate crime him you know sometimes you know people that beat aloud it's about the community sometimes and again I think I would have

[01:00:58] probably respected that twist a little bit more where you said okay Silas maybe sees some of himself and how they are maybe Silas hasn't addressing a part nope this is just normal this us between friends I did like the part where

[01:01:13] he goes to get in the car with Silas and Holly I was like oh I'm riding in the back because I need to be chauffeured like a lady and Silas is like okay get in the car and Holly waiting on him to come open the door

[01:01:25] and Silas was getting ready to pull off I said Silas ain't playing with you stop playing he's not doing it with you yeah and but again Nikki loves to have Silas around so despite our relationship I feel like it's I feel like what

[01:01:40] Holiday was demonstrating was good co-parenting we have some situations where people break up and they hate the father and they bad mouth the father all this stuff and it's like I really do feel like Holiday was exemplifying what co-parenting is if it makes Nikki happy anything

[01:01:56] that makes Nikki happy is great I also think that's why Nikki Asset ended up at the trap house because Holiday didn't put his foot down and say I don't care if it makes you happy this man is selling crack so yeah so let's talk about that

[01:02:08] Silas ends up picking up Nikki from school in a limo and I love the fact that like none of the kids outside the school give two flying ass about that limo it's like and so Nikki gets in and Silas essentially is telling Nikki that he has to go

[01:02:28] on a run and it would be two three four weeks but he's gonna come back and when he comes back he's gonna look at this house that he was looking at and Nikki obviously is looking at him like okay obviously we know Nikki is used

[01:02:45] to people leaving in her life and so when people come back she's so excited but she's traumatized and so essentially that's like another loss for Nikki she's in eighth grade he's saying he's leaving and so she has to process that so she's sitting in the back

[01:02:59] Silas's beeper goes off and he's like well listen I'm gonna drop you and he tries to do the right thing he tried to and she said no I wanna ride with you and it's like fool and then it's like he takes her to a a crack house

[01:03:16] with like people literally outside the car looking crazy he like ain't nobody gonna bother you here just keep the door locked fool this is who we gonna let parent this child that's why I started saying Holliday you might be the problem

[01:03:30] because why are you letting this girl around this fool so this part kind of like Holliday pisses me off Silas pisses me off so essentially Nikki gets out the car and she just leaves I believe her plan was she probably figured Silas

[01:03:47] is gonna do some type of drug something he's gonna be in the drug area of the neighborhood she wanted to go find her mom so she wanders the street I mean almost being traffic multiple times she makes her way into a crack house it is not funny but

[01:04:14] I yelled it is not funny but I still yelled also it's like we walk in and then we can clearly see this is a drug house but also people are you know there are sex workers there we see one sex worker that looks like a sex worker

[01:04:30] then we see Wanda we see Wanda it is a little funny what position was Wanda in? I'm not quite sure what she was gonna do down there because she was like he's standing up completely standing up straight and she's almost like on all four yeah

[01:04:48] and yet he wasn't like he was fully clothed but she was down on all four I'm not quite sure what was happening oh but you know the tragic part about this obviously this is all tragic we found this woman you know like strung out

[01:05:01] trying to do sexual favors in whatever position that was you know but when the man sees her child daughter he's like oh tell your daughter I said hey maybe your daughter could work something out and then she starts out like absolutely not not my baby

[01:05:19] I could never but then crack it just started happening she's like well hold on now maybe just give him a little kiss Nikki I said Nikki get the hell out see that's what I'm talking about y'all stop letting this girl go around

[01:05:30] sometimes you have to cut people off you have to cut people off sometimes you do even if it's your family so the person that was pimping Wanda why do they all look the same they pick the same light skin curly like I don't understand that

[01:05:48] we looking at you Terrence Howard types y'all out there y'all know who we talking about Sibuel from Soulful y'all know it's crazy so the mom essentially is like let him kiss you and so Nikki has enough sense she kicks him and gets

[01:06:07] away this is the part of the story that kind of like frustrates me so Silas calls Holiday at he's performing and essentially saying he lost Nikki and Holiday is like ahhhh and then you know hours later Silas calls and says that they found Nikki the police have Nikki

[01:06:28] he's going to get Nikki yeah so why are you still at the drag house Holiday like why are you not looking for Nikki Holiday got bills to pay okay he said look I can't just be wandering the streets looking for Nikki

[01:06:44] yeah her daddy gotta do something one day Silas gotta do something one day and then it dawned on me so the like the police call Silas the police called the crack dealer and was like hey we found your daughter that you left outside the trap house

[01:07:03] yeah that happened I was confused and then if that wasn't traumatic enough Silas still leaves his full ass said I could leave the drug game and take care of my daughter but I'd rather leave Nikki here with you the way he act like it is

[01:07:23] I'mma leave Nikki in your care Nikki shouldn't even be in your care Silas that's not your child Maury you are not the father you're not the father Holiday you're not the mama right well I mean the mother yeah and yeah so that was just crazy then

[01:07:45] Nikki goes through an era of we've all been through this era of she's going skating you told me you was going skating and you in here with this boy laid up next to ya Nikki don't get me wrong Nikki was wildin

[01:08:02] cause Nikki had a lot of makeup on it looked like Holiday did her makeup it was the braids it was a lot you think you're grown I said not dressed like that she thinks she a child cause she look like she just stumbled into her mom's

[01:08:16] makeup cabinet you know what I'm saying yeah she's growing up and she's exploring and Holiday done shut it all down I think he even slapped her now hold on again Holiday I understand this girl lives under your roof she gone vie by all your rules

[01:08:33] but you have not adopted this child you have not this is not your child you did not give birth to this child you didn't provide whatever it takes to give birth to this child and you a big dude you a big ass dude

[01:08:47] you should not be slapping open hand slapping no child I was calling social workers somebody needs to step in yes but she needed to be popped though she did need to be popped but he slapped her you know that Loretta Devine where she slaps that

[01:09:04] that literally what Holiday did you were too big for that you can't just open hand slap a little baby girl not for nothing Nikki took it too Nikki she did she ate that and then of course here go Jambalaya also it's important to note

[01:09:23] that at this point in time Holiday I don't know if Holiday sold the duplex but they're moving Holiday has a home now he bought a house for Nikki he's invested so like you know at this point in time he finds Nikki with a boy

[01:09:39] he slaps her he's like he doesn't know what's going on he's on the phone with Jambalaya Jambalaya also is no longer doing drag she has met a white farmer and Jambalaya has moved to the farm to milk cows and essentially Jambalaya gives Holiday the insight

[01:09:58] that maybe she is feeling like she's trying to be promiscuous because that's what she has seen her mother do and maybe she feels like she has to become this which is a real thing where it's like sometimes it's like the people that you hate

[01:10:12] the most you become the most like and so Holiday then has this moment with Nikki where he tells her to look in the mirror and he says you are not your mother you are not your situation like I need for you

[01:10:22] to look in the mirror and love you and I love this moment and the moment Nikki broke the mirror which I also was like now wait hold on that's how you got slapped the first time getting up to massage yourself wait wait when Holiday apologized

[01:10:38] for slapping her he's like wait why am I apologizing you the one being fast this ain't father's knows best I ain't leaving it to beaver I started to scream you pointed out the intersexuality between all of these things but it is funny that a lot of times

[01:10:55] we see Holiday Hart kind of battling with like there's like this random veil of misogyny to Holiday but then also it's also but he's like because he's giving feminine energy it's kind of like okay there's a battle there but he's a man but he's a gay man

[01:11:14] and so all of these things are fighting each other because some of these quotes you know like calling her fast for one in five kids one day why you calling her fast why you sledgehammering her you know but that's something we very much see

[01:11:24] in the black community for a long time was that little girls couldn't do nothing little black girls were getting held accountable for being victims you know like well if you weren't so fast if you wasn't dressed like that if you weren't acting like that no no no

[01:11:36] then you get to I don't got to apologize I'm the parent you know I open hand slapped this child but I ain't got to apologize you know so it's so funny to me see Holiday deal with all of those struggles at the same time and then

[01:11:49] realizing that yeah I am taking care of Nikki maybe at some point I do have to put my foot down and actually be the parent Holiday should have gone and adopted the child that's what should have happened well right because like how you take her to the doctor

[01:12:04] how do you register her for middle school for school yeah but I digress because I feel like those are just things that maybe should have would have been applied and also it was probably hard to do in 2000 to be a large gay man

[01:12:23] with long hair trying to adopt a child like I'm sure the social workers were looking at him like and you do what professionally well you know I'm a landlord slash drag queen they're like okay let me see your check stubs because something's not adding up

[01:12:37] where'd the crack come in you know what I'm saying because you still got a drug dealer paying your bills right you do and it's so interesting but I say it's so interesting because I feel like in a lot of black households things are left very ambiguous

[01:13:00] right like for instance now I don't know why I'm telling all of my family business but my mom is the oldest of I want to say six and she's the seventh but she has six siblings younger than her and she has the two youngest are her brothers

[01:13:21] uncle Joseph and uncle Tony uncle Tony is in and out of jail for the majority of my life my uncle Tony is older now and so I remember growing up my uncle Tony would like just pop up at our house

[01:13:41] I don't know why I'm telling all of my sisters so uncle Tony would like just randomly pop up at our house and again my mom was a single mother so it would just be me and my brothers home and like as a child I didn't see anything

[01:13:57] wrong with my uncle Tony popping up at our house going upstairs us still downstairs watching TV then five minutes later the police knocking on our door asking if someone else is here with us and we just being like no no like no

[01:14:17] and that be the end of it right like that's weird and we would tell my mom and my mom wouldn't say anything just things left ambiguous or here's another story that I'll never forget with my uncle Tony so we're at the mall and we're in Macy's

[01:14:37] and so I don't know if you've been to the women's department because my mom would look at stuff then it would be the jewelry department and then we would like to be able to get to the mall why one day we just randomly went to the mall

[01:14:50] me, my mom and my three brothers and we're just like walking through and we're like we gotta go to the ladies department and so then we're like walking through the ladies department we get to the jewelry department we're getting ready to walk out the mall

[01:15:04] my oldest brother goes there's uncle Tony and my mom was like what my mom snatches us the hell up and we like expeditiously leave the mall we're just like there's uncle Tony my mom's like get out of here yeah that's one of those things

[01:15:25] that you can't talk about it Bryce have you ever gotten any clothes as a gift and it had the little tag still on it you gotta melt it off real ones no you gotta melt it off y'all didn't learn that here on recap kickback

[01:15:40] the real ones no you get you a lighter and you can go ahead and get rid of that it's a gift I can't take it back I definitely didn't get no receipt and ink don't really be in them but listen some of them the circle ones and so

[01:15:56] like oh no you know later on that day we're home and not the jewelry counter was robbed at gunpoint at the like and so but we're not gonna talk about that we're not gonna talk about it yeah so it's interesting because again

[01:16:22] you talk about how these things intersect there's a level of you know when you come up in a black household and I will use this as a stereotype I don't know about all black households I'm talking about the ones I know

[01:16:34] and that's why you don't talk about those things you keep your business I'm private that's wild to me because those same black people who will completely brush that under the rug we're not gonna talk about the robbery we're not gonna talk about why the cops

[01:16:51] is here all that kind of stuff be the first one to try to put Holliday Hart on blast for what he be doing behind closed doors so it's so funny to me that you know this film kind of just like and it touches on all of them

[01:17:03] at the same time it really does and so yeah we've definitely seen situations where you know you got family members who do dirt but you don't talk about that stuff but let Holliday come in with his friend Fisher and it's you know it's World War 3

[01:17:16] it's on the evening news the whole family gonna know about it they praying at the prayer circle also speaking of the prayer circle how do you feel about Holliday being the piano player at the church house because that felt like right I mean he got the choir together

[01:17:38] you know and I don't even want to say stereotypically but I mean in our experience we've seen in my experience but also what is just so crazy about it is so many different levels of this right because also you know the church that was

[01:17:56] kicking him out was the church that Holliday that he like serves at which is also you know it's wild to me but a lot of times the choir director or the music you know head of the music or something you know they're probably queer they're probably gay

[01:18:23] but it's the same church that is like homosexuality we ain't gonna it's like make it make sense but I also feel like those things that contradict a lot of himself because it's like yeah he's different he wants to be proud of who he's different

[01:18:42] but he also is a product of his own environment and so it's like and that's just so true in the black community and especially in the queer community which is why again the nuance of Holliday Heart although it's a 2B movie I definitely think it was trying to

[01:18:58] hit on a lot of things that really happen in the community right speaking of the word hit we have to talk about the bike we have to talk about the bike now Holliday Heart is trying to get a bike for Christmas for Nikki

[01:19:14] because we know Nikki's bike got stolen way back by her mama Wanda way back when and he gets the bike ordered but before he can pick it up Wanda has intercepted the bike okay I don't know who let Wanda into this place of business but she's in there

[01:19:30] and she has the bike and she's super apologetic she's happy she says she's going through a program she can't remember how many steps are in this 12 step program but she's trying in her mind she at least acknowledges that there's a program that exists

[01:19:41] so it's very clear that she's still on drugs and that Holliday should not believe nothing that she has going on but he says he's gonna tell Nikki that the bike is from Wanda and Wanda's gonna come home and Wanda's gonna come home and let's talk about this

[01:19:57] oh yes I'm so happy you brought this up right and again I can only speak for the communities in which that I am from and that I know but I had so for instance in my child welfare experience right if a child is taken out of the home

[01:20:14] because the parent is on drugs and you know we have a family service plan we set up weekly visits every Wednesday and if you don't confirm on Tuesday by 12pm that the visit that she'll be there at the visit on Wednesday the visit is cancelled

[01:20:28] because what we are not going to do is have this child show up to a visit and you not show up and so if we've tried to do that and you can't even consistently visit and then all of a sudden you randomly show up

[01:20:41] and want to see your child in the best interest of the child we are not going to allow the child to see you because for what so that you could see the child and then break the child's heart again you need to demonstrate to us

[01:20:55] that you have started some program that you have a pattern of something like in my opinion for Holiday to in the moment like I understand what you're doing but like you need to be the protector of Nikki bringing Wanda home is not in Nikki's best interest

[01:21:17] Bryce it's giving Blanca Evangelista okay this is a horrible mother just like no disrespect I get it Holiday but you're not a bad you're a bad mom you can't keep inviting these bad things back into this girl's life and say you're raising her

[01:21:34] at some point you got to put your foot down Wanda coming back out of the blue and essentially trying to steal the bike from you, you caught her and the wig has been the worst it has gotten to the point of no return

[01:21:46] Wanda is walking up down the street like just shouting to herself, twitching you know y'all know the gif I'm talking about Wanda in the red yeah and so Holiday is like bet now you can come home no, no Holiday that's not how this works she needs help first

[01:22:02] hospital first before anything else she needs to go detox first but Holiday ends up getting in a fight with the light skinned pimp slash drug dealer guy and he because he tries to steal the bike he pulls a gun on Holiday

[01:22:18] can we also talk about the caliber of drug dealers what are y'all going to do with that bike like you have just because just because nothing else to do the block is cold okay and this is not funny I'm not laughing

[01:22:34] at the situation I'm just letting it be air the way Wanda was walking out with that bike like she was so she just knew she was gone found me a new bike Wanda get your head in the game damn it so Wanda helps out

[01:22:52] Wanda helps out Holiday as he's trying as he's getting in this fight they're about to shoot him Wanda jumps on their back saves the day and Holiday tries to get away but then in slow motion we see the moment the car is coming Wanda sees the headlights

[01:23:10] and then next thing you know all we see is the bike rolling to a stop transition they killed him with that one Bryce you can't tell me different the bike the bike rolls over yeah we see the bike but we don't see Wanda but we don't know

[01:23:26] but listen we see the car coming we see Holiday and we see Wanda now mind you why Wanda is smiling as the car is coming she was we don't know then again transition and now it's at a grave site and Nikki is talking and Nikki is

[01:23:46] saying we buried you next to Fisher we figured you would want to be next to Fisher Fisher is probably taking care of you so we are all like they killed Holiday and then as the screen pans we can see Holiday's large hands with his on Nikki

[01:24:08] and we see that it's Wanda and again despite the transitions I thought that this was such a real ending and I'm not saying that this is a happy ending but I'm just saying that this is such a real ending right like there are just so many times

[01:24:26] so many people that I know or have the experience of like someone being addicted to something and we as a family want the best for them but like we always don't get the most favorable outcomes and so like I thought this was such a

[01:24:40] real moment or just a real part of the story where it's actually not really a happy ending but I thought this was that Nikki was to be raised and have this family and she has Holiday she has Silas but Silas is still Why does she have Silas?

[01:24:56] Why is Silas back? He showed up again the man bent gold he bent gold He showed up and is leaving again Yeah, he like when I get back I got a surprise for you baby girl and Holiday like oh Silas and then that's it

[01:25:14] that's the end of the movie they all live happily ever after you live happily ever after with the man who got Wanda back on drugs He didn't get her back on drugs though, Wanda got her husband back on drugs I blame him

[01:25:26] Holiday finally got to go to Paris and mind you Holiday and Fisher was supposed to go. Holiday he dreamt of going to Paris with someone that he loved and having this amazing experience and it wasn't the experience that he wanted however he got to give this

[01:25:42] little black girl that he loved the experience of traveling and he still got to go to Paris with someone that he loved Yeah, and we don't know what he found in Paris either because like I said the travel agent said they call it gay Paris for a

[01:25:54] reason you know and like you can get down out there Holiday so maybe Holiday will find love or something like that I just wish they had done it without Silas because I'm not quite sure why he's still a part of this family. Like what is he doing?

[01:26:06] What is he bringing to the table? He paying for that house Okay, I definitely feel like a down payment was definitely made through some crack or some type of money. But I do love the fact that there are so many times where I know of situations that

[01:26:22] a man has been with a woman she already had a previous child that wasn't his and then like you know their relationship faded and he has stayed in the child's life so I do appreciate Silas still staying around although it's probably not the healthiest or the safest

[01:26:36] thing but for the consistency and for her to have quote on quote a father figure like a Silas I think it's just your family dynamic isn't perfect it's not always the most healthiest thing but like if they love

[01:26:56] I don't know I just felt like again we got this family unit. We don't love it all the way but it's Nikki's family unit Yeah and it's like a lot of times you can't choose your family. There are a lot of communities where you do go

[01:27:08] out and you try to choose your family but even then you know you get these people warts and all flaws and all you know no one's perfect and so this is the family that Holiday never knew he needed but he has it now and I think he would

[01:27:20] you know he'd rather die than give it up we see that cause he was telling Nikki very early on like girl I'll take a bullet for you and I was like alright you don't know her but now you know

[01:27:30] they've been through a lot. They battle tested. This family has probably been a lot stronger than probably some you know natural born families probably are right where they like everybody's genetically related whereas here it's like no they're kind of the chosen family but it works for them

[01:27:44] now personally again I think you could kick Silas out this mix unless he's financing this whole situation but aside from that no Holiday finally got what he was always looking for which is a family and some people to give all that love to

[01:27:56] because he was willing to give it to anybody literally anybody. Everybody who wanted some holiday could get some holiday I would take you in I think Jambalaya told him like hey you gotta take off your cape you know what I'm saying like don't run

[01:28:11] over there to rush over there to save everybody all the time but that's what Holiday was looking for he found a family that he needed. Nikki obviously needed somebody to raise her in a stable household and Holiday's gonna be as stable as it's gonna get

[01:28:21] so I'm happy it worked out for them but Bryce if you had asked me the plot of this movie like a week ago before I watched it I'd have been like I don't know I have no clue

[01:28:31] but it wasn't this I didn't think it was gonna be this but I had so much fun talking about it with you I agree I always thought the plot I knew Wanda was on drugs and I thought it was more so with like

[01:28:41] Wanda in drugs but I also remember Wanda coming back like I was shocked at how this ended but no I thank you for honoring your word Silas and coming back and allowing us to review Holiday's heart. As they say on a show I used to

[01:29:01] watch Rap Shit back at it like it's cracked and so yeah I of course had to have you back on Bryce it's always a pleasure getting to talk to you but of course we had

[01:29:11] to do this movie review it's been in the back of my head for a long time ever since you mentioned it and I thought okay what better time than pride month for us to talk about something that really touched on a lot

[01:29:21] of the topics that we just discussed right where we're talking about Holiday being feminine and presenting but also a big masculine guy at the same time. Is Holiday trans? Is he gender nonconforming? Is he like an Uncle Cliff type? Is he a big Frida type?

[01:29:35] There's so many people that will probably see themselves in Holiday Heart and probably did in 2000 and couldn't talk about it right saw it and was like man I can relate to that and I don't know how to feel about it but now here it is in 2024

[01:29:47] where a lot of this stuff is much more commonplace there's definitely a ton of work to be done in the communities to make sure that these people are taken care of and that they're protected and are treated like humans all the time but watching Holiday Heart

[01:29:59] a movie set in 2000 really talk about the dynamic between this man who I guess these people have never seen anything like him before and how he really indoctrinated himself in their lives and became a part of their community and brought them into

[01:30:13] his life really and was a good change for them right? He helped them for the better despite all these stereotypes that he would be bad for them and that this would be a bad influence. He really showed up and showed out for them so it was a fun

[01:30:25] watch I'm glad you came up with it and we have to have you on soon again to talk about more movies Bryce we gotta keep this going. Yes I absolutely think we should I see you and Mari talking House of Dragons

[01:30:35] you know I watch House of Dragons hopefully of course when P. Vali comes back I love to be back you know I'm like Silas with the recap kickback you know I gotta go take care of something but I always come back. Back at it

[01:30:49] like it's crack. So Brycey in the meantime before we get you next time obviously again love having you on but tell everybody what you have going on in your neck of the woods and how they can support you because you always support me. Come on Silas

[01:31:03] well listen I am Nikki and you know the Purple Pants podcast we are gearing up for a rewatch of Amazing Race season 5 we're gonna be dropping that every Tuesday I have my Purple Pants play by play where we're talking WNBA we're getting ready to talk the new

[01:31:21] NBA rookies next week so I have a lot of things the Purple Pants Premonitions Barb's Message and so you know always fun at the Purple Pants podcast we're getting ready to drop the 2025 Zaddy calendar so it's a lot of things cooking over here so I always appreciate this

[01:31:37] and thank you so much for having me Chappelle it's always fun to be back home Yes welcome back home of course Brycey and speaking of WNBA I of course listened to your podcast about it I loved it so I'm telling y'all right now

[01:31:49] if y'all wanna hear you want to hear Bryce talk about the WNBA and it is a great episode of the Purple Pants podcast so check that out I assembled a panel of my own, Geneva and Tresi over there from the Who Y'all Gonna Be There podcast

[01:32:03] they came on to talk about Power of the Dream which is the WNBA documentary that just dropped on Prime where they talked about a lot of the social activism of the WNBA so you know between 2016 and 2001-ish when there was a lot of

[01:32:17] protesting about you know black lives mattering and you know whether the cops were targeting black people at a disproportionate rate and COVID and women's rights and you know all these rights and the WNBA was at the forefront of all that activism and it's in that documentary

[01:32:35] so I definitely strongly suggest that if you haven't listened to it, if you haven't watched the documentary check it out on Prime The WNBA existed before Caitlyn Clark? Listen, apparently but check out the podcast with me, Geneva and Tresi where we talk about you know

[01:32:51] the WNBA, its growth and you know some of the players' responsibility or the way they feel responsible to take out you know a I guess a vocal position in the WNBA when it comes to activism and standing up for each other so that was a fun podcast

[01:33:07] check that out here on RecapKickback.com of course like Bryce said House of the Dragon we do a lot of coverage every week me and Mario are tackling it but we'll be bringing in some guests, we'll be looking for Brycey very soon

[01:33:17] and then Bryce and I are gonna probably talk about some other things in the future, we talked about P-Valley in the past so we're gonna try to bring that back whenever it's time but check me out on RecapKickback.com go to RecapKickback.com slash subscribe

[01:33:29] to subscribe to the podcast and then of course go to YouTube.com slash at RecapKickback to keep up with all the rest of the stuff we have going on and to subscribe to the YouTube channel and support that

[01:33:39] you can catch me here, you can catch Bryce at the Purple Pants podcast and at Bryce Isaiah on all social media platforms as well I believe and you know check me out at RecapKickback to keep up with all I have going on but for Bryce and for

[01:33:51] myself you ain't gotta go home but we'll catch you all next time. Peace!